Thanksgiving is all about good food, family time, and a whole lot of laughs.
And let’s face it—sometimes we need a few jokes to keep everyone entertained while the turkey roasts or to keep the kids laughing at the dinner table.
A little humor goes a long way in making the holiday feel extra fun and memorable!
Here are a few Thanksgiving jokes to get everyone chuckling:
“Why did the turkey bring a microphone to dinner? Because it wanted to give everyone a drumstick performance! 🎤🦃”
“What did the sweet potato say to the butter? ‘I’m yamming for you!’ 🥔💛”
“Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? It had 24 carrots in it! 🥕💰”
“If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims! 🌸🛳️”
“Why did the cranberry turn red? Because it saw the turkey dressing! 😂🍇”
From playful puns to classic one-liners, this post is packed with Thanksgiving jokes that are perfect for sharing with family and friends.
Ready to bring more laughter to your holiday table? Dive in for more family-friendly fun! 😄🦃
Classic Thanksgiving Turkey Jokes
- Why did the turkey bring a microphone to Thanksgiving?
Because it wanted to give a peck-formance! - What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
Wing, wing! - Why did the turkey sit at the kids’ table?
He wanted to avoid the chopping block! - What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?
Peach gobbler! - Why don’t turkeys play sports?
Because they’re always getting “fowl” calls! - Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
“Turkey.”
Turkey who?
“Turkey your time, it’s Thanksgiving!” - What’s a turkey’s favorite dance move?
The drumstick shuffle! - Why did the turkey bring a suitcase?
He was getting ready to be stuffed! - What do you get when you cross a turkey with a ghost?
A poultry-geist! - Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
“Corn.”
Corn who?
“Corn-gratulations on finding the best Thanksgiving jokes!”
Family-Friendly Thanksgiving Knock-Knock Jokes
- Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
Dewey have to eat all this food? - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Butter.
Butter who?
Butter pass the stuffing! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up! I’m hungry! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive the turkey, especially with gravy! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce give thanks today! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Tamara.
Tamara who?
Tamara we eat leftovers! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Pie.
Pie who?
Pie love Thanksgiving desserts! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Arthur.
Arthur who?
Arthur any leftovers?
Corny Corn Jokes
- Why did the corn cross the road?
Because it was being stalked! - What did the corn say to the butter?
I’m all ears! - Why didn’t the corn get invited to Thanksgiving?
Because it always pops up unannounced! - How does corn share a secret?
It whispers in hushed tones! - What’s corn’s favorite holiday song?
“I’m dreaming of a white corn-mas!” - Why was the corn so popular?
Because it was a-maize-ing! - What’s a corn’s favorite movie?
“Field of Dreams!” - How did the corn ask for directions?
“Can you point me in the right stalk?” - Why do corn jokes always make you smile?
Because they’re just ear-resistible! - What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
“Where’s popcorn?”
Stuffing Jokes to Fill Up the Room with Laughter
- What’s the best thing about stuffing?
It fills you up in all the right places! - What did the stuffing say to the turkey?
You’ve got guts! - Why did the stuffing get promoted?
Because it’s always in the middle of everything! - What’s stuffing’s favorite exercise?
“Crunches!” - Why did the stuffing break up with the cranberry sauce?
It found someone a little less saucy! - How does stuffing like to travel?
By gravy boat! - What did the stuffing say at Thanksgiving dinner?
“I’m here to spice things up!” - Why did the stuffing fail its math test?
It couldn’t handle the “stuff” in fractions! - How do you know stuffing is a great listener?
It’s always stuffed with good advice! - What’s stuffing’s favorite song?
“Can’t Stuff Falling in Love with You!”
Pumpkin Jokes That are Squash-tastically Funny
- Why was the pumpkin so popular?
Because it had all the filling! - What do you call a pumpkin that works out?
A jacked-o’-lantern! - Why did the pumpkin break up with the pie?
Because it just couldn’t commit-mint! - What’s a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
Squash! - How do pumpkins greet each other?
“Gourd to see you!” - Why do pumpkins make terrible comedians?
They always leave everyone in pieces! - What did the pumpkin say to its crush?
“I only have pies for you!” - What’s a pumpkin’s favorite dessert?
Anything they can get their “patch” on! - How do pumpkins travel?
On a pie-cycle! - Why did the pumpkin cross the road?
To spice things up!
Pilgrim and History-Themed Thanksgiving Jokes
- Why did the Pilgrims’ pants keep falling down?
Because they wore their belt on their hat! - How did the Pilgrims show their gratitude?
They gave maize-age! - Why did the Pilgrims sail to America in the spring?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers! - What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
Plymouth Rock! - Why was the Pilgrim so bad at telling secrets?
Because he couldn’t keep his gobble shut! - How did the Pilgrims bake bread?
With a little help from their “yeast” coast friends! - What’s a Pilgrim’s favorite type of car?
A Plymouth! - Why didn’t the Pilgrims tell secrets on the Mayflower?
Because the ship had too many leaks! - What did the Pilgrims use to freshen their breath?
Pil-mints! - Why did the turkey cross the Mayflower?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
Thanksgiving Jokes for the Food-Lovers in the Family
- Why did the mashed potatoes turn red?
They saw the turkey dressing! - What do you call a Thanksgiving feast for vegetarians?
Harvest Festival! - Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive?
Because it had 24 carrots! - What’s the best way to stuff a turkey?
Serve it lots of mashed potatoes and gravy! - Why did the green beans join the band?
They wanted to be part of the “beet”! - What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?
Peach gobbler! - Why did the cranberry sauce break up with the turkey?
It found someone sweeter! - How do you fix a broken pumpkin pie?
With a little pumpkin patch! - What did the sweet potato say to the casserole?
“You complete me!” - Why did the gravy get invited to every meal?
Because it always knows how to pour on the charm!
Dessert Jokes for a Sweet Ending
- Why did the pie break up with the cranberry sauce?
It felt too crusty! - What did one pie say to the other?
“Stop being so flaky!” - Why did the cookie feel sad?
Because it was feeling crumby! - What’s a dessert’s favorite song?
“Sweet Dreams are Made of This!” - Why did the ice cream get invited to Thanksgiving dinner?
Because it was cool with everyone! - How does a cake say goodbye?
“I’ll dessert you soon!” - What’s the best way to make an apple pie smile?
Give it a little “crusty” compliment! - Why was the pumpkin pie so good at telling jokes?
Because it had the best “filling” for humor! - What did the dessert say to the guest?
“You’re the apple of my pie!” - Why don’t cakes tell secrets?
Because they’re always “layered” with gossip!
Gravy Jokes to Get the Giggles Going
- Why did the turkey refuse the gravy?
It didn’t want to be sauced! - What does gravy say when it meets mashed potatoes?
“Let’s get saucy!” - Why is gravy always invited to Thanksgiving?
Because it knows how to pour on the charm! - What’s gravy’s favorite hobby?
Basting in its own success! - Why did the gravy apply for a new job?
It wanted to spice up its life! - How does gravy handle stress?
It just goes with the “flow”! - Why don’t gravies ever get into arguments?
Because they don’t like to stir up trouble! - What did the gravy say to the roast?
“You’re the meat to my potatoes!” - How did the gravy feel about Thanksgiving?
It was over the “top”! - Why did the gravy break up with the cranberry sauce?
It found someone with more “substance”!
Vegetarian Thanksgiving Jokes
- What did the vegetarian say at Thanksgiving?
“I’m here for the side dish supremacy!” - Why don’t vegetarians like Thanksgiving?
Because it’s a turkey-nator! - Why did the veggie plate get all the attention?
Because it was a-peeling! - What’s a vegetarian’s favorite holiday song?
“Oh Kale, Yeah!” - Why did the vegetarian bring a suitcase to Thanksgiving?
Because they wanted to pack the leftovers with veggies! - How did the vegetarian show up to Thanksgiving dinner?
With all the peas and quiet! - What did the mashed potatoes say to the green beans?
“You’re my side dish soulmate!” - Why did the salad break up with the roast?
It just couldn’t beet it! - What’s a vegetarian’s favorite thing about Thanksgiving?
All the stuffing, none of the fluffing! - Why did the carrot join the Thanksgiving feast?
Because it couldn’t turnip an invitation!
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes by Famous People to Lighten the Mood
- “Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.”
– Erma Bombeck - “It’s not the minutes spent at the table that put on weight, it’s the seconds.”
– Unknown - “An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.”
– Irv Kupcinet - “Coexistence: what the farmer does with the turkey—until Thanksgiving.”
– Mike Connolly - “I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.”
– Jon Stewart - “My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.”
– Phyllis Diller - “The Thanksgiving tradition is, we overeat. ‘Hey, how about at Thanksgiving we just eat a lot?’ But we do that every day! ‘Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?’”
– Jim Gaffigan - “On Thanksgiving Day, all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment—halftime.”
– Unknown - “You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.”
– Jay Leno - “I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.”
– Erma Bombeck
One-Liners for the Thanksgiving Table: Quick and Witty
- “I’m just here for the pie.”
- “I don’t know what’s more stuffed, the turkey or me!”
- “Thankful for elastic waistbands today.”
- “Calories don’t count on Thanksgiving!”
- “I came, I saw, I conquered…the mashed potatoes.”
- “May your turkey be moist, and may no one use that word to describe it.”
- “Grateful for family, food, and an afternoon nap.”
- “Pass the gravy…and then pass it again.”
- “Save the carbs, I’m going in for round two!”
- “Let’s give thanks…for leftovers tomorrow!”
- “Eating this much should count as a workout.”
- “I’m in a serious relationship with mashed potatoes.”
- “Feast mode: activated.”
- “The secret ingredient is always butter.”
- “Giving thanks and eating ranks!”
Jokes About the Thanksgiving Football Game Tradition
- Why did the turkey join the football team?
Because it wanted to be a drumstick! - What’s a turkey’s favorite position in football?
A wing-back! - Why do turkeys make terrible quarterbacks?
Because they always get sacked! - Why did the turkey referee get fired?
It kept calling “fowl” plays! - What’s a turkey’s least favorite part of the football game?
The chop block! - Why don’t turkeys play football on Thanksgiving?
Because they’re too afraid of getting roasted! - How do you know it’s Thanksgiving on the football field?
When you see a lot of stuffing and tackling! - Why did the cranberry sauce go to the football game?
It heard there would be a lot of turnovers! - What’s a football fan’s favorite dessert on Thanksgiving?
Apple punt pie! - What did the turkey say to the football coach?
“Put me in, I’m ready to tackle the feast!”
Funny Observations About Family Gatherings
- “Family gatherings: where it’s rude to ask for seconds… until someone else does.”
- “You know it’s a family gathering when you hear, ‘Who’s bringing the Tupperware?’”
- “Nothing says family like avoiding certain topics at dinner.”
- “Family gatherings: come for the food, stay for the gossip.”
- “The real family tradition? Pretending we’ll actually eat less next year.”
- “Family: the only people who ask how you’re doing and then answer for you.”
- “Thanksgiving: when family comes together to test each other’s patience.”
- “Ah, family gatherings. The perfect blend of love, laughter, and thinly veiled sarcasm.”
- “The best part of family gatherings? The leftovers… and leaving.”
- “It’s not a family gathering until someone says, ‘I remember when you were this big!’”
- “There’s nothing like family to remind you where you got all your quirks.”
- “Family gatherings: where dessert is served, but humble pie is always on the menu.”
- “Thanksgiving with family: half feast, half family reunion, all comedy show.”
Thanksgiving Jokes for the Grown-Ups
- What’s the best wine at Thanksgiving?
“When’s it over?” - Why did the turkey join a dating site?
It was looking for a breast friend! - Why don’t Thanksgiving leftovers ever win an argument?
Because they’re always getting reheated! - Why did the pie go to therapy?
It couldn’t handle the “crust” of it all! - How do Thanksgiving chefs stay calm?
They whisk it all away! - Why did the family argue about the gravy?
Because it kept getting in a “heated” discussion! - What did the mashed potatoes say after Thanksgiving dinner?
“I’m whipped!” - Why did the cranberry sauce file a complaint?
It thought it was being canned! - Why don’t turkeys play poker on Thanksgiving?
Because they’re afraid of getting roasted! - What’s the real reason behind Thanksgiving?
To officially open pie season! - Why did everyone avoid the green bean casserole?
Because it was stirring up trouble!
Funny Thanksgiving “Would You Rather” Questions
- Would you rather have to eat Thanksgiving leftovers for a year or never eat pumpkin pie again?
- Would you rather cook the entire Thanksgiving meal by yourself or do all the dishes alone?
- Would you rather wear a pilgrim hat to every family event or have to talk like a turkey for a whole day?
- Would you rather give up your seat at the Thanksgiving table or give up the last slice of pie?
- Would you rather only eat the Thanksgiving side dishes or only eat the turkey?
- Would you rather have gravy on everything you eat or cranberry sauce on everything you drink?
- Would you rather spend Thanksgiving without your favorite dish or have to double up on your least favorite?
- Would you rather be in charge of making the stuffing or the cranberry sauce every year?
- Would you rather watch football all day or help everyone take a post-feast nap?
- Would you rather have to gobble like a turkey every time you speak or do a little Thanksgiving dance whenever you enter a room?
- Would you rather only eat cold leftovers or only eat overly dry turkey?
- Would you rather skip Thanksgiving dessert or have to sing a solo after dinner?
- Would you rather have a turkey that’s too dry or mashed potatoes that are too lumpy?
- Would you rather have Thanksgiving dinner with your extended family or with a group of complete strangers?
- Would you rather have a parade float dedicated to you or be the star of the family Thanksgiving talent show?
Thanksgiving Tongue Twisters for Extra Fun
- Thanksgiving turkey tasted terrific!
- Stuffing stumps silly siblings.
- Plump pumpkin pies piled perfectly.
- Cranberry crunches create crumbly chaos.
- Turkey tickles tiny toddlers’ tummies.
- Green beans bring big belly laughs.
- Gravy gurgles gracefully in grandma’s gravy boat.
- Family feasts fill full folks.
- Pilgrims picked plentiful pumpkins.
- Ten tiny turkeys trotting to the table.
- Bubbly buttered biscuits baking beautifully.
- Try telling tales of tasty Thanksgiving treats.
- Silly stuffing slides swiftly.
- Tim the turkey trotted timidly through the town.
- Cranberry cobbler crumbles cleverly.
Thanksgiving Puns for Every Part of the Meal
- “I yam what I yam.”
- “I’m on a roll – pass the bread!”
- “Gravy expectations for this meal!”
- “Don’t be corny, just pass the kernels.”
- “Feeling stuffed already!”
- “Let’s give ’em pumpkin to talk about!”
- “The turkey and I are in a serious relationship – it’s complicated!”
- “This feast is un-beet-able!”
- “Pie think this dessert deserves a standing ovation!”
- “Lettuce give thanks for these greens!”
- “Sweet potatoes, you’ve got me all mashed up!”
- “This stuffing is the ‘stuff’ of legends!”
- “Don’t dessert me, pie! You’re too sweet!”
- “Cran you believe how good this sauce is?”
- “We’re here for a gravy time!”
- “These mashed potatoes are smashing!”
- “Butter be ready to roll after this meal!”
- “Feast mode: activated!”
- “Lettuce romaine calm and enjoy the meal!”
Thanksgiving Dinner Ice-Breaker Jokes
- What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving?
Lucky! - Why didn’t the cranberry join the band?
It couldn’t find its jam. - Why did the sweet potato turn down the invite?
It didn’t want to be roasted! - What kind of music do pilgrims listen to?
Plymouth Rock! - Why did the turkey sit at the kids’ table?
Because it wanted to avoid the chopping block! - What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin pi! - Why was the stuffing invited to every meal?
Because it’s always the life of the party! - What’s a turkey’s favorite type of weather?
Fowl weather! - How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
I’ll tell you at Thanksgiving dinner! - Why don’t turkeys tell secrets?
Because they have too many big mouths to keep quiet! - What did one pie say to the other pie?
“You’re my slice of happiness!” - How does a Thanksgiving meal stay humble?
By buttering up everyone at the table! - Why was the green bean casserole so confident?
Because it knew it was always a crowd-pleaser! - What did the mashed potatoes say to the gravy?
“You complete me!” - Why did the turkey stay home on Thanksgiving?
It was already stuffed!
