Hilarious Quotes About Babies That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

Having an infant son alerts me to the fact that every man, at one point, has peed on his own face.  

Olivia Wilde 

Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.  

Tina Fey 

When kids hit one year old, it’s like hanging out with a miniature drunk. You have to hold onto them. They bump into things. They laugh and cry. They urinate. They vomit.

Gisele Bündchen,  

“You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.”  

Franklin P. Jone

“Babies used to make me nervous, but these squirmy things are awesome once you’ve read the manual.” 

David Z. Hirsch 

“Make no mistake about why these babies are here—they are here to replace us.” 

Jerry Seinfeld

“A baby is a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other.”  

Ronald Knox 

“Before I got married I had six theories about raising children. Now, I have six children and no theories.”  

John Wilmot 

“The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby’s grandparents. You feel completely comfortable entrusting your baby to them for long periods, which is why most grandparents flee to Florida.”  

Dave Barry 

“If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?”  

Milton Berle 

A Moment of Joy:  Celebrate Newborns with these Quotes