100+ Best Funny Christmas Captions
This Christmas 2022 we’ve gathered the Best Funny Christmas captions.
Funny Christmas captions can help make your holiday more fun! Whether you’re posting a photo on social media, sending out a holiday card, or just looking for a good laugh, a humorous caption can add a bit of cheer to the festivities. From puns and witty one-liners to silly quotes, there’s sure to be something to get everyone smiling. So, make your Christmas merry and bright with a chuckle-worthy caption this holiday season!
Did you just have the most amazing time at Christmas and are now looking for Cute Merry Christmas Wishes for Instagram, inspiration or decorations?
You know what, Christmas is not complete without these Christmas prayers, Christmas movies, Christmas wishes with family friends.
Here you will find, Christmas wishes, quotes, sayings, and captions Ideas for mom, dad, family, friends, husband, wife boyfriend, girlfriend (couple), father-in-law, mother-in-law or any other person whom you want to wish happy Christmas. Do not forget to Christmas messages for son, daughter, nephew, children, boss, co-workers.
If you like Christmas quotes, then check out our lists of Short Christmas Quotes, Funny Christmas Quotes, Cute Christmas Quotes, Christmas Family Quotes, Christmas Tree Quotes, Christmas Quotes for Friends, Christmas Sayings, Christmas Wishes, Funny Christmas Wishes, Funny Christmas Captions, Cute Christmas Captions, and Christmas Tree Captions.
You might also want to check out our Christmas Gifts Ideas.
Table of Contents
Funny Christmas Captions
Santa saw your Instagram and said, “you’ve been naughty!”
Don’t get your tinsel in a tangle.
Ho Ho Ho and a bottle of eggnog.
Santa said he’s watching… and taking notes.
Christmas cheer? More like Christmas beer.
Christmas tree, check. Presents, check. Reindeer, check.
Don’t get your holiday cards in a bunch.
All I want for Christmas is a really big lunch.
Santa, can I have an extra day off?
Cookies for Santa, carrots for the reindeer.
Christmas is a time for fun and family—and presents!
Let the holiday festivities begin!
Get lit with Christmas lights.
Don’t get your holly and jolly in a jam.
Having a holly jolly Christmas.
Let the holiday cheer consume you.
This holiday season is all about the sparkle.
Christmas is all about spreading joy.
Making spirits bright this holiday season.
Christmas is all about love and laughter.
Funny Christmas Captions for Instagram
The elf did it.
Permanently on the naughty list.
Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Nevermind, I’ll buy my own stuff.
Visions of sugarplums and all that jazz.
Finally made the nice list.
When life gives you snow, make snow angels.
Dear Santa, define ‘nice.’
One day of coal vs. 364 days of fun… I’ll take my chances.
Do Santa’s cookies pair well with white wine? Asking for a friend.
*Puts a selfie on top of the Christmas tree because I’m a star*
Merry Elfin Christmas
Totally sleighed it.
Keep your friends close, your enemies closer and receipts for all major purchases.
All the jingle ladies.
The tree isn’t the only thing getting lit this year.
It’s beginning to *cost* a lot like Christmas.
But first, let me take an elfie.
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas. But if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.
Me everyday: slay. Me in December: sleigh.
Can’t wait to exchange all these presents.
This is my resting Grinch face.
Don’t mind me, I’ll just be over here crying and watching Hallmark Christmas movies.
At least the presents were beautifully wrapped for a couple hours …
I’ll be ho-ho-home for Christmas.
One more cookie and I swear I’ll fit in the Santa costume.
Instead of listing everyone in this photo, let’s just call it, “The Naughty List”
Don’t get your tinsel in a tangle.
It’s like they WANT stockings full of coal.
Current status: ready for a long winter’s nap.
All I want for Christmas is you (and maybe some cookies, too)
Bah, humbug.
Elfie time.
Are you on the 😈 or 😇 list this year?
All I want for Christmas is food.
Feelin’ frosty.
Single and ready to jingle.
What happens under the mistletoe, stays under the mistletoe.
‘Tis the season to be jolly.
Say it ain’t snow.
Yes, I do consider myself a Christmas tree hugger.
A round of Santa-plause, please.
Hibernation mode: On.
Funny Christmas Captions for Couples
In the words of Mariah Carey, all I want for Christmas is you.
It was love at frost sight.
Merry elfin’ Christmas.
The tree isn’t the only thing getting lit this year.
We’ve got chemis-tree.
No laws when you’re drinking for Mr. Claus.
We’re only morning people on December 25th.
But wait—there’s myrrh.
That’s a wrap on our first Christmas together.
But first, let us take an elfie.
Making [S.O.’s name] put me at the top of the tree because I’m a star.
The only person I’ll watch Hallmark movies with.
What happens under the mistletoe stays under the mistletoe.
We’ve been 51% nice and 49% naughty.
Dear Santa, we can explain…
Love you almost as much as I love Christmas cookies.
Feast mode: On.
I only have ice for you.
We’re just a couple of candy canes: sweet, and slightly twisted.
Making it rein.
All you want for Christmas.
VIP members of the naughty list.
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, everyone was taking pics for Insta.
Dating me is the gift this year.
Ho, ho, home for Christmas.
Don’t get your Christmas socks in a tangle.
Santa listened.
I’m Santa’s favorite.
You’re on my list.
Funny and Clever Christmas Captions
“I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.”
“When You Say Blizzard, We Think Dairy Queen.”
“I Hope Rudolph Eats the Naughty List.”
“Merry Elfin Christmas.”
“Dear Santa, is it too late now to say sorry?”
“That’s too small to fit a pony.”
“Too bad we can’t gift wrap common sense.”
“Don’t get your tinsel in a tangle.”
“Being related to me is really the only gift you need. Just saying.”
“Feast mode.”
“Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in awhile. Nevermind, I’ll buy my own stuff.”
“Permanently on the naughty list and loving every minute of it.”
“When someone asks ‘where is your Christmas spirit?’ is it wrong to point to the liquor cabinet?”
“Friends are like Christmas lights. Some are broke. Others just don’t work for you and there are others that make your day shine bright.”
“You rock my Christmas socks.”
“What did one ornament say to another? ‘I like hanging with you.’”
“The only time of year in which one can sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of socks.”
“Single bells, single bells, single all the way.”
“But first, let me take an elfie.”
“Dear Santa… I can explain.”
“Happy holla days.”
“Happy holiyays.”
“Totally sleighed it.”
“The elf did it.”
“Just so we’re clear, the Grinch never really hated Christmas. He hated people, which is fair.”
“Dear Santa, define ‘nice.’”
“What do you call an elf who sings? A Wrapper.”
“’Tis the season! Let the overeating begin!”
“I’ll be ho-ho-home for Christmas.”
“My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge.”
“Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and receipts for all major purchases.”
“I haven’t taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.”
“One day of coal vs. 364 days of fun… I’ll take my chances.”
“What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite!”
*Puts a selfie on top of the Christmas tree because I’m a star*
“Nothing says holiday like a cheese log.”
Witty Cute Christmas Captions
“Forget about the sweets, I just want wine”.
“Status with girlfriend: Mingle but ready to jingle”.
“Wine suits well with an insane family”.
“You should take my selfie as the Christmas card”.
“Eat, Drink, Nap Repeat”.
“Wintry Feeling”.
“Dear Santa, define ‘delightful’”.
“The season for stretchy pants has arrived”.
“My name is Sleigh, I repeat, Sleigh”.
“Did Christmas Shopping? Be toughening for the January sales”.
“Everyone tidy up in new clothes”.
“Santa’s belongings filled my stockings”.
“All the work to be done later, firstly let’s take an elfie”.
“To be Clear, Grinch hated people, which is fair ”
“This year, we totally sleigh it”.
“Dear Santa Clause……Let me explain”.
“Hot cocoa and Christmas music, nothing else I want”.
“Ho-ho-ho-home”.
“Christmas= Peace, Charity among humans+ cookies+ battery not included”.
“Rest of the year me: slay, near Christmas me: sleigh”.
“I decided to not take out my lights this year as these look prettier”.
“This Christmas, I am starting my Feast mode”.
“The tea is compulsory while the relatives are not”.
“Santa Claus inspired us, Visit people only once in the whole year”.
“I can’t wait to exchange those wonderful presents that I received”.
“It’s true that Christmas is a magical day of the year…..my whole money magically disappears”.
“Spiritually I am prepared for Christmas, economically I am not”.
“If you are lacking in the art of wrapping the presents then make their appearance like they possessed a fight”.
“I left sugar free sweets and soy milk for Santa, in return there was a diet chart in my stocking”.
Funny and Sassy Christmas Captions
Sleigh, what?!
Snow time like the present.
All the jingle ladies.
Oh deer.
Have your elf a merry Christmas.
On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prosecco, on Whiskey! On Donner, on Bourbon and now I’m Blitzen!
Dear Santa, I tried. Can we talk?
Let’s skip the presents and get right to the cookies.
May you never be too grown up to ask other people for gift cards.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure “socks” were not on my list.
Do they make red reindeer noses in LED bulbs? Asking for a friend.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Unless you’re at the mall. Then it’s a different story altogether.
Let’s just say that the Christmas tree isn’t the only thing getting lit this year.
Forget the garland, I’m in it for the swag.
On the naughty list. Sorry, not sorry.
There’s only one Christmas spirit and I just poured it into a glass.
Does Santa’s workshop offer 1-day delivery?
Dysfunctional family motto: Have yourself a scary little Christmas.
Christmas rules: No early arrivers. No late stayers.
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but rosé will do in a pinch.
If the holidays were “fun” then there’d be no such thing as therapy.
Santa called. Let’s just say you’re on one of the lists.
The only tree I’m putting up this year grows money.
It’s the gift that counts, not the thought.
Christmas: The one time of year a home invasion is encouraged.
Jingle bills, jingle bills, all I do is pay.
Short Funny Christmas Quotes for Instagram
“Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” – Gary Allan
“Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.” – Andy Borowitz
“Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.” – Victor Borge
“My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge.” – Melanie White
“Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home.” – Carol Nelson
“I haven’t taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.” – Winston Spear
“The perfect Christmas tree? All Christmas trees are perfect!” – Charles N Barnard
“Christmas tree stands are the work of the devil and they want you dead.” – Bill Bryson
“I hate the radio this time of year because they play “All I Want For Christmas Is You” like, every other song. And that’s just not enough.” – Bridger Winegar
“A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.” – Garrison Keillor
“I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange.” – Henny Youngman
“The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” – Will Ferrell, “Elf”
“Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help.” – Andy Borowitz
“That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.” – Jerry Seinfeld
“Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.” – Kin Hubbard
“Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. You know, the birth of Santa?” – Matt Groening
“It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.” – Anon
“Who’s the bane of Santa’s life? The elf and safety officer.” – Catherine Tate
“Did you ever notice that life seems to follow certain patterns? Like I noticed that every year around this time I hear Christmas music.” – Tom Sims
Funny Christmas Puns
Sleigh it ain’t so!
Single bells, single bells, single all the way!
Make it rein, deer.
Don’t mind the resting Grinch face.
It’s the most wonderful time for a beer!
Hold me closer, tiny Dancer!
The Christmas spirit really soots you.
This hot chocolate is delicious, may I have some myrrh?
This Christmas is orna-meant to be the best one yet.
You’re adorabell!
Simply having a wonderful Christmas thyme.
That’s a wrap.
I only have ice fir yule.
Who’s Santa’s favorite cartoon character? Chimney Cricket.
Baby, it’s coald outside.
Wreath it and weep.
Having something under the tree is such a gift.
Yule be home for Christmas.
Oh, deer.
Prosecc-ho-ho-ho.
It’s simple Claus and effect.
After Christmas, I make it rein.
A penny fir your thoughts.
You’re mistletoe-ing the line.
Didn’t mean to give you the cold shoulder—it was just freezing outside.
It’s the most wine-derful time of the year.
Have you been naughty or ice?
We whisk you a merry Christmash.
.This all seems (orna)ment to be.
Soots me.
Avoiding the elf-phant in the room.
I always have the final sleigh.
(Snow)ball’s in your court.
Read more Christmas Puns That Are Elfin Hilarious
Funny Holiday Captions
“I’m dreaming of a white Christmas… but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.”
“Me every day: Slay. Me during Christmastime: Sleigh.”
“Dachshund through the snow.”
“I think I totally sleigh’d it.”
“Single and ready to jingle.”
“My favorite winter activity is going back inside and putting my PJs on.”
“There’s [snow emoji] place like [home emoji].”
“Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.”
“I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.” — Erma Bombeck
“Don’t like my Christmas puns? That’s pretty Rude-olph you.”
“I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.” — Shirley Temple
“We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns, and syrup.” — Elf
“I’m going to lay under the tree to remind my family that I am a gift.”
“Dear, Santa. If it’s easier, you can just leave your credit card under the tree.”
“When you stop believing in Santa, you get underwear.”
“Son of a nutcracker!” — Elf
“Feeling just pine sitting near the Christmas tree.”
“Always believe in your elf.”
“Santa and I get along because I also like cookies and look great in red.”
“Oh gingersnap.”
“Here comes Amazon. Here comes Amazon. Right down my driveway.”
“Yule are my fire.”
“But first, let’s take an elfie.”
Funny Santa Captions
Just waiting for the man with the bag.
It’s a good thing Santa didn’t see my browser history
It’s all fun and games ’till Santa checks the naughty list
Up on the housetop, click, click, click.
Does Santa have GPS?
I like Santa Claus because he only visits once a year. Every guest should follow his example
I hope I don’t see mommy kissing Santa Claus
Kids are tucked in, time for mommy to kiss Santa Claus.
I want a fat bank account and a slim waist for Christmas this year. You better not mix those two up, Santa!
Dear Santa, is there still time to make the nice list?
Be naughty, save Santa the trip
Do you think he really knows when we are sleeping?
I wonder if I can catch Santa on my ring cam.
Any time now, Santa.
Santa, stop here. We have cookies.
I feel better knowing Santa will also be unemployed after Christmas
I hope that St. Nicholas will soon be here.
Will Santa still come if I’m up all night with the baby?
No pouts around here. We are ready for Santa to come to town!
One more sleep until Santa is here!
Funny Christmas Tree Captions
Consider this my Christmas card.
Our tree is a little flocked up, but it’s perfect for us.
The only time of year you can sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of socks.
Don’t get your tinsel in a tangle.
You could say we like Christmas, fir sure.
Can I get a watt watt? Because my tree is lit.
Birch, please.
It’s looking like a Charlie Brown tree kind of year.
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree, your ornaments are history.
Gonna go lay under the Christmas tree to remind my family that I’m a gift.
I’m putting a selfie on top of the Christmas tree this year because I’m a star.
This is our tree, Spruce Willis.
Two is company. Tree’s a crowd.
Why can’t Christmas trees knit? Because they’re constantly dropping their needles.
What did one ornament say to another? ‘I like hanging with you.’
What do Christmas trees feel when they get numb from the cold? Pines and needles.
Sorry for such a sappy post, but I just really love my Christmas tree.
“Christmas tree stands are the work of the devil and they want you dead.” — Bill Bryson
“I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.” — Maya Angelou
“I like indoor Christmas trees. And I like people who decorate their homes with lights and all that crap. I think it’s a healthy outlet for them. If they weren’t covering their lawns with twinkling lights, they’d be doing something that was really, really creepy.” — Lewis Black
“Taking down the Christmas tree makes it feel official: time to get back to joyless and cynical.” — Greg Fitzsimmons
Funny Christmas Card Captions
It’s the most wine-derful time of the year
Have a cool yule and swell noel
“Zen Christmas: the gift of nothingness.”
I hope you love the present you told me to buy for you
Christmas comes but once a year, but when it comes, it better bring good beer
Santa ho ho hopes you’ve been good this year
“Happy holidays from the jolliest bunch of elves this side of the nuthouse.”
All I want for Christmas is see the link to my wish list
Time to get into the Christmas spirit – vodka, gin, rum, etc.
“Another Christmas already? Seriously, what the elf?”
Santa saw your Instagram. You’re getting a muumuu and a Bible for Christmas
Christmas is Claus for celebration!
“Keep Calm and jingle all the way.”
May your holidays be as lovely as they look on Instagram
May your gifts be many, and your returns and exchanges be few
“Have a cool yule and swell noel.”
“Don we now our ugly sweaters.”
I put so much thought into your gift, that I never got around to actually buying it. Merry Christmas, anyway!
Let’s be naughty and save Santa a trip
“May all your sweaters be ugly and bright!”
“May your gifts be many, and your returns and exchanges be few.”
On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me … What is this, and did you keep the receipt?
May the Christmas season fill your home with joy, your heart with love, and your life with absolutely everything you put on your wish list
“I spent a long time choosing the perfect Christmas card that will look good in your garbage.”
“Happy holidays from someone using environmental friendliness as an excuse for being too cheap and lazy to send an actual card.”
“Merry Christmas! I hope you like the Christmas present you told me to buy for you.”
“That warm feeling isn’t just the Christmas spirit. I think you left the oven on.”
“Sure, being on the Nice List may get you more presents, but being Naughty is its own reward.”
“The Nice List can’t handle me.”
“Proud members of the Naughty List!”
“I hope your smiles will be as big as your credit card bill this Christmas! I wish you good luck and a lot of fun. Happy Christmas!”
“It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.”
“A broken drum is always the best Christmas gift. It simply can’t be beat!”
Funny Christmas Lights Captions
Dream big, sparkle more, shine bright.”
“Christmas is too sparkly… said no one ever.”
“Don’t get your tinsel in a tangle.”
“Where the treetops glisten.” — Bing Crosby, “White Christmas”
“All the jingle ladies.”
“Leave a little sparkle wherever you go.”
“‘Tis the season to sparkle.”
“Decking the halls in sparkles.”
“Glitter is the new black.”
“There’s room for everyone on the nice list.” — Buddy the Elf, Elf
“Sleighed it.”
“All is calm, all is bright.” — Bing Crosby, “Silent Night”
“Fairy lights on winter nights.”
“Merry everything and a happy always.”
“She who leaves a trail of glitter is never forgotten.”
“May you never be too grown up to search the skies on Christmas Eve.”
“Have yourself a merry little Christmas.” — Hugh Martin and Ralph Blane, “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”
“When in doubt, add more sparkle.”
“‘Tis the season to be cheesin’.”
“Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can’t see.” — The Conductor, The Polar Express
Funny Merry Christmas Captions
No really, all I want for Christmas is you.
Cuddle weather is my favorite weather.
I’m going to put so many tiny sweaters on so many pets.
“The thing about Christmas is that it tells us that we are never alone. But even more, it tells us that we are always enough.” —Craig D. Lounsbrough
Sweeter than a sugarplum.
Look at all my little reindeers.
“Its not about the place we want to visit , its about with whom we visit.” —Sachin Keely
I can’t wait to show my cats snow for the first time.
My dog keeps trying to grab snowflakes out of the air.
We haven’t been iceskating in years!
“Whatever the Grinch can steal, it’s not Christmas.” —Sophie Kinsella, “Christmas Shopaholic”
I’ll be there with silver bells on.
It’s the perfect evening for getting carried away in the snow, then warming up with some hot chocolate.
I can’t give you the world, but I can give you a big hug.
Someone couldn’t quite stay awake long enough to meet Santa.
Building our first snowman together.
“The true Christmas spirit is putting others’ happiness before our own, and finding you’ve never known such happiness.” —Toni Sorenson
Hanging out with my friends is the best Christmas gift.
The cats didn’t care about the snow.
“Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone.” —Charles M. Schulz
Funny Christmas Captions
“I think Santa had the right idea. Visit people only once a year.” —Nitya Prakash
Running through a winter wonderland before all the stores close.
There’s no business like snow business!
I don’t care how long it takes, I’m going to play in the snow this year.
“At Christmas, tea is compulsory. Relatives are optional.” —Robert Godden
How do you like my mistletoe hat?
I’m back, Grinches!
How many candy canes go on the tree? All the candy canes.
Too many Christmas cookies, too little time.
“Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out any quicker than the Christmas spirit” —Kin Hubbard
We need a 13th day of Christmas. But no more birds, please.
Poor Rudolph’s nose must have been REALLY cold.
If the way to someone’s heart is through their stomach, I’ve got Santa wrapped around my finger.
“Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!” —Francis P. Church
Pretty sure the gingerbread house has a gingerbread mouse.
Who wants to make snow devils?I like to live in the present(s).
I’d Marry Christmas if I could.
“There’s no experience quite like cutting your own live Christmas tree out of your neighbor’s yard.” —Dan Florence, “Zombies Love Pizza”
I found Old King Coal in my stocking.
Yass, queen, sleigh!
Ho-ho-hold on there, champ!
Funny Winter Captions
let’s make it a winter to remember.
O, wind, if winter comes, can spring be far behind?
Winter is a season of recovery and preparation.
Apologizing in advance for the things I say this winter.
Nothing beats a good snuggle on a cold winter’s night.
We are like a snowflake, all different in our own beautiful way.
‘Tis the season to be freezin’
Winter is like fall except you need five pairs of leggings instead of one.
My favorite winter activity is going back inside and putting my pajamas on.
You’re the only reason I’m not hibernating this winter.
If only my teeth were as white as my legs in the winter…
If you listen carefully, the winter silence is beautiful.
They who sing through the summer must dance in the winter.
It’s a beautiful day to go outside and remind myself why I stay inside.
All about that winter white
I love snowfall and winter because it gives us more reasons to cuddle!
In the winter she curls up around a good book and dreams away the cold.
Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth; it is the time for home.
And finally, Winter, with its bitin’, whinin’ wind, and all the land will be mantled with snow.
If snowflakes were currency, we’d all be rich in winter. We’d just make a trip to the nearest snow bank.
Funny Snow Captions
Don’t let the smile fool you — I couldn’t feel my toes when this was taken!
Time to ice skate like nobody’s watching (hopefully nobody is actually watching)
It’s all downhill from here
Winter: My new excuse for drinking more coffee
The snuggle is real
When it snows, you have two choices: shovel or make snow angels.
I don’t go ice skating… I’m not afraid of falling, I’m afraid of running into little kids.
It’s only cold if you’re standing still.
My favourite outdoor activity is going back inside.
It’s snow joke outside
How does a Snowman get to work? By icicle.
Watch Your Step – It Could Be Your Last.
Tis the season to be freezing.
Up to snow good.
Final thoughts on Funny Christmas Captions for Instagram.
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it’s time to check out our Valentines day to welcome this most festive of months.
Let us know in the comments below if we missed any Cute Merry Christmas Wishes for cards that should be added.
